10 cars under 30k that will (help) get you laid
This is a response to 10 cars that are guaranteed to get you laid on a budget that was up on Digg from ridelust.com that was absolutely horrible. They had a freakin’ Hyundai and a Crown Vic on their list for Christ sakes!
No offense ridelust, some of the cars on the list were ok, but you completely lost me with the Crown Vic! Unless you are planning on getting laid without the lady’s consent, then probably want to leave the fake undercover police car at home (Double baco cheeseburger. It’s for a cop…).
Ok so here we go…
1. BMW M3
This is a sexy car. It makes a subtle statement with the bulging fenders and aggressive look. Both genders will appreciate this car. It says “Hey I like to go fast, but in style”, and oh yeah, “I have money and will buy you lots of expensive things”. At least that’s what she will think, and that is really all that matters to get her in the sack. You can bag a 2001-2002 M3 for under 30k and people will still think you’re loaded.
2. Porsche Boxster
Believe it or not, you too can be a Porsche driving douche for under 20k! Note, most 2001-2003’s will be between ~20-25k, but they are out there. Sure it might be cheap, but no self respecting little slut can resist the allure of a Porsche, and the boxter has nice lines to appreciate. bonus points…it’s a convertible. This will allow her to ride shotgun (or otherwise) with the top down getting her revved up, all while being able to flaunt her position to all the other materialistic sluts you happen to pass while on the ride back to your place.
3. Audi S4
This is a bit more subtle compared to the M3, and a lot more subtle than the Boxster. It says, “Hey, I have a good job, I appreciate nice things, and I don’t need to flaunt it”. It is like a fine wine, and an intelligent woman will appreciate this statement, and be very curious what else you have that makes this kind of statement. Bring her home and show her what could be hers…at least until the next morning anyways.
4. Nissan 300zx TT
While this is one of the older cars on the list, the Z is still a chic magnet. 91-96 TT’s can be had well under 20k, and have a timeless look that makes a statement. T-tops, sexy lines, twin turbo…the right lady will appreciate this car and want to go for a ride…
5. Mercedes-Benz C230
Yes, a Benzo. I don’t particularly like the Benzo, but it does scream out “Hey I (think I) have money, I like expensive things, and I need a hottie riding dirty”. No matter, this thing will turn the right heads if you’re looking to score, and aren’t afraid to flaunt it. These can be had for under $25k.
6. Honda S2000
Another convertible…see above. This will appeal to a different sort of gal, but that isn’t a bad thing. It says, “Hey I’m young, I like sports cars, and I might go racing later tonight at an abandoned strip of road”. You can only pull this one off if you’re under 40 and don’t look too creepy.
7. Lexus IS300
The IS300 has been out of production for a while, but still grabs eyeballs with it’s very unique design. It doesn’t scream out wealth, but certainly garners another look, and curiosity to follow home.
8. Cadillac STS
Yes, it’s not the played out Escalade, and besides, unless you look like an aspiring rap star an Escalade ain’t gonna help your game anyways. The STS looks aggressive, and it *IS* a Cadillac, so chances are you’ll snag a hottie looking for her sugar daddy…at least for an evening romp.
9. Acura NSX
The NSX…possibly the sexiest car on the list, and at a minimum scores massive “uniqueness” points. On the other hand, they are hard to find, and you’ll likely be getting a 92 or older model for under $30k. Not so practical, but *almost* guaranteed to get you laid. This car would turn heads in a church parking lot.
10. Pontiac Solstice
Yeah yeah, it’s a Pontiac, but it is convertible (see above) and for some reason attracts slutty chicks. Hey it will get more looks than your 1994 Corolla, and it’s pretty quick too.
That’s all, if you take our advice and get laid, let us know! If you don’t, then look for our upcoming article on the do’s and don’t of picking a good plastic surgeon. Cheers!
I bookmarked your blog, thanks for sharing this very interesting article
Wow, that’s a little extreme!
No way, I wasn’t offended at all, I got a kick out of your list actually
[Plus, the comments people left were WAY more harsh, I got called everything from a shallow whore to a retard, lol].
Hi Suzanne, thanks! I hope you weren’t offended, this was my interpretation…
On the Crown Vic, make sure that uniform is real!
You know I can’t believe how much flak I caught for including the Crown Vic on that list… there was even a Fire/EMS/Police forum that was discussing the list that couldn’t believe the Crown Vic made it either. I guess maybe I included it because I happen to have a thing for uniforms…
I liked your list, especially the bit about the Pontiac Solstice, you were dead-on-balls accurate. I have no idea why it is, but slutty chicks and swingers do flock to those Solstice’s like moths to a flame.